Hi Dad,
Out of all the moments we’ve shared for the past 25 years, it’s funny how the ones that stick out to me are so subtle – the way you roll your eyes when I come home and lay on the floor with Ewok, the way you offer to drive me somewhere because I can’t parallel park, and the way you email my articles to your friends regardless of the fact that my target audience is millennial women.
Amongst the chaos in my life, I sometimes lose sight of how important you are – because I’m so focused on discovering who I am.
Blame it on hopeful thinking, but the idea of change hasn’t become a reality to me yet. I can’t imagine a day where you won’t meet me at the door. Or a moment where you won’t get out of bed. Yet the beauty of life is that people don’t last forever – and that’s what makes you so special. Whether it’s how you try to wear your poncho from the dollar store or the reason for why you text me in the 3rd person, you’re the cutest person I know and the greatest dad I could ask for.
In all honesty, I’m not scared of common things – I don’t fear failure, that’s just experience. I don’t fear heights, that’s just a view from the top of the world. And I don’t fear moving, that’s just an adventure waiting to happen.
But the one thing I fear? Only knowing you as my childhood hero – instead of a normal human.
You aren’t simply someone who brought me sledding during those Minnesota winters, but someone with thoughts, beliefs, and experiences that are different from mine. And my wish is to learn them all. As I continue to grow as an adult, I can finally conceptualize how challenging it is to raise a family – to selflessly love someone to the point that you would do anything for him or her. While I haven’t experienced this type of love, I feel it from you every single day. With my own deadlines to meet and my own dreams to fulfill, I’ve now come to the stage in my life where I can start to grasp how much you’ve truly given up for me.
You sacrificed your life in hopes that I could live a better one.
And for that, I can’t thank you enough. Despite the fact that my life (and gray hair) probably stress you out, I’m grateful because you’ve provided me the chance to be happy. Your existence is why I’m here, your support is why I’m free, and your love is why I’m going to be successful and make you proud.
Words don’t let me down and neither have you.
So here I am expressing how much you mean to me in the one way that I know – through the use of writing and the belief that this passion of mine has saved me in a similar way that you have. While I’m not sure what I’ve done to deserve you, I’m relieved to know you and still have you. Through your years of shaping me as a person and encouraging me to be a fighter, you’ve given me the confidence to believe that I deserve the world – and now I’m not settling for anything less. So thank you. I love you.
Love,
Christina
Photo Credit: Unsplash
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